TSA – You Fascist Assholes

Well, it was bound to happen. Despite having pre-approval tickets to not get hassled at the TSA security, I did. Going through the metal detector revealed nothing, but the brace I’m having to wear triggered a tactical response from these fascist bastards.

I am SO F*ING SICK of the knee-jerk, fear-mongering CRAP being practiced upon Americans by our fascist overlords.

Although I offered to go back through the metal detector, take off the brace (made entirely of foam and velcro) and send the device through their xray machine, they refused. So there I stand, while passenger after passenger brushes by (something I was trying to avoid since I have about 3 ft of stitches).

There were no instructions, no explanations, no offers on what I could “do”. Just stand there while this idiotic fucking moron (Perez) glared at me and refused to allow me to do anything.

So a ‘special officer’ comes by and takes me for additional screening. He doesn’t like his job, doesn’t like me either. Of course, nothing is found on the hand swab. Nothing is found in or on the brace, nothing is found on me and I’m ‘free to go’ after having submitted to the fascist fears of the TSA. But not before receiving a ‘warning’ to ‘descalate’ the ‘situation’.

Well you fascist pricks – I didn’t do anything – YOU DID. Perhaps it’s normal for you jack-boots to mistreat everyone that comes into YOUR airport but it’s not something I’m used to.

I hate flying. I hate what this kountry has become. I can’t wait to get home.

Fuck you TSA. You’re doing a shit-job ‘protecting’ us from all the articles I’ve read (quite a few). Security isn’t mistreating passengers or refusing instructions, explanations, signs or assistance.

Update: Typed this detail ‘report’ up on the plane (because I’m really mad):

Few points I forgot to mention.

We were waved initially through the first check of security with boarding passes marked with orange felt pen (there are apparently 3 levels or more you pass through). This orange “get out of jail” mark was supposed to pass us right through security, but didn’t. The guard with the orange pen had examined my boarding pass and told us to be sure to show the next security person these orange marks on the passes, which I did, but he ignored them.

Now we had to get pass the baggage xray detector, and the personnel metal detector. We approached and I started to unwind my computer shoulder belt from my luggage. My wife slipped her purse off her luggage and placed this into a tray.

But I could not lift my bag up onto the conveyor belt for xray. The guard would not assist in lifting the bags up. I told him that I could not lift the bag and requested assistance. He ignored this completely despite my obviously being unable to do it. My wife did this for me after feeding all of her belongings through their machine – but what would have happened if I had traveled alone?

I then told my wife to go through the metal detector ahead of me, so she could collect our belongings on the other side.

The guard then told me I had to remove my computer from its case and place this into the tray. It was now down on the floor near my feet. Right now, it’s difficult to bend over that far and grasp anything (pulls the skin graft and stitches and I was strapped into the arm brace).

I was also told I had to remove my wallet and toss it into another tray (this wallet was  zipped up in the computer bag). My wife was already now on the ‘other side’ in security hell, so she wasn’t available to me anymore.

So I struggled to get the computer case up into the air, remove computer and remove the wallet from separate compartments. It was at this point I started getting mad. What difference did it make to remove my wallet? It wasn’t on me and was going through the xray machine with the computer. I told him it only contained money and no metal, but he demanded that it go through the xray machine by itself. So now it goes into the tray by itself as I have no choice but to leave the airport.

Morever, there are a lot of people picking up their belongings from the trays that have passed through xray. I looked – there is nobody watching them or what they’re picking up either. So what happens if my wallet is stolen? Or this computer?

This is asinine ‘security’. It’s nothing more then bullying passengers by rent-a-cops with gigantic ego’s. They do it because they can. They need their asses kicked.

So computer now gets sent through the xray, and computer case. Now it’s my turn to go through the metal detector. I go through just fine, no warning noises, no SWAT team tackles or shots the head. But the guard ‘Perez’ stops me immediately after stepping through on the ‘other side’ where security hell really begins. This is where you get to meet the real TSA goons and experience their disdain for the people their ‘helping’.

I asked him why he stopped me, and Perez states that he detained me because I did not remove all personal items. Me, being the bright and intelligent person that I am, knew without asking (intuition at work here) that the padded brace under my arm was ‘probably it’. I told Perez that I didn’t realize that I’d need to remove this too since nothing was said to me on the ‘other side’ nor are there any signs or instructions, but would do so right now. He said “it’s too late for that”. I then offered to send it through the xray machine and even go back through the metal detector myself. I offered to make this right. Nope – not possible. I had to ‘stand there’ where instructed.

JFK – I had traveled exactly two feet, but now I was not allowed to travel back to the real world where we all still retained a few shreds of dignity and Constitutional protections (so they say – I know better, but hell, I’m trying to make a point here).

So there I stood, ‘detained’ in security hell, while passenger after passenger streamed by. I hollered to my wife who was now way down at the other end to be sure she collected my wallet and computer – which she didn’t know I had had to ‘remove’ and place separately in the trays.

I stated that there are no instructions provided before passing through the metal detector and that being detained like this was absolutely ridiculous. Let me go back through and I’ll send the brace through the machine as they wanted. Nope, that’s ‘not allowed’. I told Perez that this was ridiculous.

Perez then stated “You could have driven” which was not much help now and definitely out of line. Yeah, I could have driven, and tried to endure an excruciating long-distance trip by car over two days. But now I was stuck, unable to proceed.

Perez instructed me to continue to “stand there” while he contacted the Sky Gods and Rulers of the Airport to ‘assist me further’. I did not have to wait long, perhaps five minutes, but that’s a lot of people streaming by. I could see my concerned, but not yet frantic wife, down at the other end of the xray conveyor belt. So far, I wasn’t in jail, so no real panic yet.

A badged and uniformed man appears and Perez speaks to him. He instructs me to follow him, which I do. But my thoughts made it out of my mouth, but not too loud – “fascist bastards”. He stops and say’s “What was that?” and I wimped out, thinking that I don’t need this shit right now, the timing and situation is not right (pick your battles people – make it count when and where it counts). “Nothing, I was talking to my wife”, I reply. He turns back around marches me to a special check station, where I’m a bit isolated from everyone else while my wife looks on. There’s another guy sitting there too.

The first thing Sky Cop says is ‘you need to descalate this situation’. What situation? The one these morons created? The ‘situation’ where our rights, privacy and dignity is all set aside and we submit to humiliation? How am I suppose to do that? I’d be happy to help dismantle this joke – give me a hammer. I’m also pretty good with a sawsall and a few other destructive devices – including this computer. But I kept these thoughts to myself.

He takes my hands and swabs them with a towlette, which is then passed to another man who places this into a machine while he stares at the screen. This doesn’t take long, and Mr. I’m Keeping Us Safe explains that they “have to be certain” that everything checks out. I offer to remove the arm brace which I’m only partly ‘allowed’ to do. Apparently, “it’s not necessary” now. What then was THAT all about a few minutes ago? I tell this superior person of obviously low intelligence that I’ve got 3 feet of stitches around my shoulder and down across my back, so he needs to be careful poking around “there”.

My brace is searched with gloved hands for contraband and kiddie porn and god knows what else. But it’s not xrayed. What kind of security is this? Are these idiots Keystone cops or what?

So now I’m instructed that I’m “free to go” which fills me with dread… no, with anger. This is their idea of ‘security’? No clear instructions? No assistance? No real examination? I was waiting for the truncheons and head beatings to come next – c’mon, I can take it, I’m tough as hell. At least I could then sue these pricks and get my medical costs paid for.

Nope, it’s time to go. Another ‘successful intervention’ against a ‘possible errorist’ (spelling intentional). YES, I made the mistake of assuming that a foam filled and velcro strapped brace (plastic buckles) stuck up under my arm was just as ‘dangerous’ as the hiking boots that I did NOT take off, which passed through their examinations with flying colors (no alarms, no beeps, no explosions). Yep, that was MY mistake. But no accomodations for the obviously injured.

Guess I should have taken off my pants while I was at it – and mooned these fascist assholes.

I have no patience for incompetent stupidity – not even my own. But I also don’t think that the TSA is doing a damned thing to ‘protect passengers’ with these ridiculous ‘requirements’ – which if you keep up on the news, don’t work.

I spoke out against the TSA right here on this blog years ago – when they first implemented these assinine security checks in a typical American knee-jerk response. I also vowed back then that I’d ‘never fly’ which held true all these years – until I had to have medical help. Flying is the only real option in some cases like this one with me. But if you fly, you can kiss your Constitutional rights away because there ain’t any ‘rights’ here.

Stupid fuckers. Goons in uniforms pretending to be what they’re not, security experts while harassing those that they can.

Oh – my wife got through without disruption with tweezers, fingernail clippers and nary a feel-you-up. Weired, no?

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